044 - Eily

14-8-00 22:24:04 -0400 (EDT)


As a child, I had many dreams that dealt with my personal power. Coming from a co-dependant / alcoholic family, I felt helpless much of the time. I would dream that I was strong and that I could conquer any obstacle, change any situation that I wanted to just with my will. I would also have dreams that seemed to real that I would get up and go look for the items I dreamed about.

My family thought dreams were useless, since my mother and father had to let go of their dreams many years earlier.

I lived in an area that was primarily farming and industrial areas. Everyone was very practical and dreams had no place when everyone was trying to make a living. Teachers would punish me for daydreaming in class and I was called lazy for not paying attention.

Turning point

I have spent much of my life experiencing deja vu -- primarily from dreams relating to *real life*. I also realized at an early age that I was meant to do different things with my life than what my parents and community thought I should. I kept a hold of my dreams because they always indicated that I would attain the personal power and respect that I had always wanted.

As life went on, I realized that my dreams were giving me information from *somewhere* and it was pretty good information!

I taught myself to drive while dreaming. I had gone through driver's ed when I was a teen and had spent some time behind the wheel of a car, but did not have the opportunity to really learn to drive. I was in an abusive marriage and every time my ex husband would take me out to drive, he would yell and hit me when I made a mistake. Thus I became very frightened to drive. I finally got enough courage up to file for divorce and realized that I would need to learn to drive so I could make a living for my family. My marriage kept me isolated from society in general and I did not know anyone well enough to ask to teach me to drive. Faced with this dilemma and my growing need to be self-sufficient, I began dreaming about driving a car. I dreamed about how it felt to sit in the drivers seat. I dreamed about the pull of the steering wheel when turning and the appropriate pressure required to brake. I became so proficient driving in my dreams when I finally got a car given to me, I was able to get in and drive it with no nervousness. I actually drove for 8 months without a drivers license, without notice or accident (I don't recommend this, by the way) before I actually went to get one. It was amazing. I have used this method to teach myself how to use a sewing machine too.

Today, I use my dreams to gauge what is going on in my life. I keep a dream journal. I also use my dreams to go places where I have never been. Many times, after dreaming about friends, I either get phone calls from them or find out that situations in their lives parallel what I was dreaming about.

I feel that I do most of my personal work in my dreams. I have taken meds that have given me dreamless sleep and I discontinued them just for that reason. It is disturbing for me to go through a day without my dreams.


I define the dreamstate as an alternate reality that assists me in this reality.


I pay attention to my dreams more and more, as they become more and more pertinent to my life and my path. Without my dreams I would not have met my current husband, have my current job or be in the place I am spiritually. I trust my own inner dream world more than the advice of any psychologist or professional.

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